Environmentalists want us to reduce our carbon footprints to zero. They say this is crucial to ensure the survivability of the Earth. A lot of us hear that and think, “No carbon footprint? Why, that would throw us back to the 1800’s!”
It turns out that isn’t entirely accurate. If they want us to eliminate our carbon footprint we’ll need to go back to at least the Bronze Age, according to a team of religious fanatics researchers at the University of Wisconsin-Madison.
These idiots dedicated researchers looked for the precise point in time when humans began messing up the utopia that Chance had provided for us. They looked long before the internal combustion engine. Ages prior to the advent of the modern military-industrial complex. Even thousands of years before the industrial revolution. What they probably made up entirely found was that human beings started crapping up the world about the same time we started feeding ourselves. Presumably their data wouldn’t support pinning the blame on productivity, so they did the next best thing. Blame all of mankind.
In an apparent endorsement of the hunter-gatherer lifestyle, the report says:
“Using powerful SUPERcomputers and ADVANCED climate models, the researchers concluded that methane and carbon dioxide - the building blocks of global warming - began rising with the introduction of rice cultivation and large-scale tree removal.”
Well there you have it. I wonder if they used the same model that predicted rain for me yesterday. They need to fine tune that one. I’m still digging out of the snow. The article goes on:
"I think that the take-home message is that this hypothesis shows that climates are extremely sensitive to small variations in greenhouse gases," said Steve Vavrus, a climatologist at UW's Center for Climatic Research, on his way to San Francisco to preach to the choir.
Could fascist government controls on Moses and his contemporaries have averted this disaster? Was that where we all went wrong?
I just wonder what time period the environmentalists of Moses’ day would have wanted to force him back to?
No comments:
Post a Comment